October 28, 2004

Witches, Testicles, and NyQuil

Lying in bed today in a semi-conscious stupor, I've come up with an idea for Halloween. I think I can rig up a cool cauldron/witch thing for the front yard. I have some oversized pots for plants and could paint one of them black, then put a fog machine in it with a green light. But then how would I get a witch to stand by it? I'm thinking just a 2x4 cross dressed in witchy apparel, including an oversized hat. Anyone have better ideas for a quick and easy way to do that? (And am I evil for thinking putting a cross in the yard on Halloween and then putting witch clothes on said cross would be funny?)

Also, I read something about testicles...80% of men have the left one hanging lower than the right one. It's apparently the opposite for left-handed men, however--their right testicle hangs lower. If only I was on intimate enough terms with a lefty to inquire about his testicles. If only. So...anyone care to confirm or deny this factoid for me? Anyone?

Posted by Jennifer at October 28, 2004 12:58 PM

While I find the dressing up a cross as a witch extremely amusing, I'd ease up on the Nyquil... If you're thinking about indications of handedness through evaluations of testicle elevation, I'm getting worried about you!!!

Posted by: Jack at October 28, 2004 01:27 PM

Sorry, I can't answer your last question, either. I'm right handed, but I'm also "even"...

Posted by: Jack at October 28, 2004 01:28 PM

Even...don't they knock together?

You brought it up, not me.

Posted by: Jennifer at October 28, 2004 02:14 PM

I kinda like the cross idea; I imagine it as sort of a cross between a witch and a scarecrow. But, some parents and other passersby might think it's offensive for some nagging yet unknown reason.

I've heard the story about testicles, too, though I have no idea if it's true. In fact, my trusty old response to the greeting "Hey, Spork, how's it hangin'?!" for years has been: "Oh... Low and a little to the left!"

The guys always laugh. The gals just stare at me questioningly.

Posted by: Tuning Spork at October 28, 2004 07:55 PM

Right-handed and the right one hangs a little lower.

Posted by: Harvey at October 29, 2004 11:34 AM

Right-handed. Lower on the left.

Posted by: JohnL at October 29, 2004 01:17 PM

No knocking together, but that's 'cause I wear briefs, and I don't run when I'm nekkid...

Posted by: Jack at October 29, 2004 06:49 PM

For science:

Posted by: House of Payne at October 29, 2004 11:27 PM

When I first read that I thought it said "... a 24x7 cross dresser..." and said to myself, "Hey, that would work."

early morning/first cup of coffee

Posted by: Mike S at October 30, 2004 06:35 AM

Wow... I'm right handed, and my left one hangs lower too... Amazing what they pay scientists these days to discover. Wonder how that hypothesus gets started?

Posted by: Kyle at October 31, 2004 10:49 PM

I'm a righty, and my right testicle hangs lower.

Posted by: James at November 20, 2004 11:56 PM

Re. your second bit.Was havin' this conversation last night & found your site. I'm left handed & hang lower to the right, so hope this helps

Posted by: Chris at December 18, 2004 05:40 PM