*February 27

1991--Kuwait was liberated 4 days after the ground offensive began in Desert Storm.

1950--the 22nd Amendment was passed, limiting the president to two terms.

1807--Henry Wadsworth Longfellow was born.

Happy birthday to Elizabeth Taylor (1932) and Ralph Nader (1934).

*Quotes of the Day

(Oddly, the server at work is still down and keeping me from doing, you know, work--but internet access is up again. So I blog.)

"A work of art is useless. So is a flower." -Oscar Wilde

"An artist is someone who produces things that people don't need to have but that he--for some good reason--thinks it would be a good idea to give them." -Andy Warhol

Presidential Fun Fact of the Day

Tidbits from Andrew Jackson's inaugurations:

1. Jackson had two pairs of glasses--one for reading and one for distances--and he wore both to his inauguration. The unused pair sat atop his head, and some citizens were convinced the metal glints they saw were pieces of metal inserted in his head to fix bullet wounds.

2. Jackson opened the White House reception to the public, who came in droves. Fistfights broke out, china was broken, people stood on the furniture to see the President, and they mobbed waiters carrying tubs of punch. The waiters and the punch ended up on the floor. To clear out the White House, the staff carried tubs of punch out to the lawn.

3. His wife, Rachel, died shortly after his election to the White House, and Jackson was still in mourning when he traveled to Washington, D.C. for his inauguration. He wanted to make sure there was no commotion surrounding his journey, but at every stop there were crowds of people and cannons and rifles to salute him.

4. He learned that an escort of well-wishers, marching bands, and cannons were scheduled to meet him at the Washington city limits. Jackson made sure to get to the city hours before he was expected and managed to get to his hotel with only a small group following him.

5. Due to the bitter feelings left over from their campaigns, Jackson did not invite John Quincy Adams to attend his inaugural. Adams was advised by his associates not to attend, and did not.

Presidential Fun Fact of the Day

Tidbits from John Quincy Adams's inauguration:

1. JQA was the first American president to take the Oath of Office while wearing long pants.

2. He didn't use the Bible for his Oath. Instead, he put his hand on a law book because he felt the Bible was inappropriate for the government ceremony. He is the only president to use a book other than the Bible.

3. He also refrained from adding "so help me God" to the end of the Oath.

4. Similar to his father, JQA didn't get much sleep before his inauguration. He wrote in his diary that he had two sleepless nights.

5. JQA had fewer popular votes and fewer electoral votes than his opponent, Andrew Jackson. Jackson did not have enough electoral votes to win, and the election was decided by the House of Representatives. Adams addressed this in his inaugural speech, saying, "Less possessed of your confidence in advance than any of my predecessors, I am deeply conscious of the prospect that I shall stand more and oftener in need of your indulgence."

*Quote of the Day

"None of us really understands what's going on with all these numbers." -David Stockman, Director of Office of Management and Budget, 1981.

"That most delicious of all privileges--spending other people's money." -John Randolph, congressman during 1799-1829.

*February 25

1964-At the age of 22, Cassius Clay defeated Sonny Liston to become the heavyweight boxing champion.

1791- The first national bank was chartered. The First Bank of the U.S. was opened in Philadelphia, but lost its charter in 1811. The Second Bank was chartered in 1816, and that charter expired in 1836...there has been no central bank since then. The Federal Reserve System, established in 1913, carries out the central bank functions.

*The French Were Ahead of Their Time

The parachute was invented more than 100 years* before the airplane.

Frenchman Louis Lenormand designed one in 1783 to save people caught in burning buildings.

* There is some evidence that shows the ancient Chinese actually invented one, too.

Presidential Fun Fact of the Day

Some tidbits from James Monroe's inaugurals:

1. Monroe's 1817 procession to the Capitol had not only the militiamen Madison had used, but also hundreds of people on horseback. The inaugural parade was slowly developing.

2. His second inauguration fell on a Sunday and was postponed until Monday. Since his first term officially ended at noon Sunday, there was--strictly speaking--no President for 24 hours.

3. His first inaugural was held outdoors due to a last-minute decision. He and Speaker of the House Henry Clay had a quarrel, and Clay then insisted the floor of the House would not support such a large audience. The weather was warm enough that Monroe responded that he would just hold it outside.

4. The warm weather for Monroe's first inauguration was unusual for Washington, D.C. on March 4. It was the first D.C. inaugural to be outside (George Washington's was outside in New York City), and the second one was scheduled to be held outside as well. Unfortunately, the weather did not cooperate and it had to be moved back indoors.

Lemon: Bone-Dissolver

Know why you get lemon with your fish?

It's not flavoring.

Back in the Middle Ages, they started serving lemon with fish because you might accidentally swallow a fish bone. The lemon was meant to be ingested in such an instance in order to dissolve the bone.

I'd do a science project to test the merit of this, but I'm fresh out of lemon. And bones. Too bad I don't know any scientists.

You Asked, Graumagus Answers

The long-awaited Graumagus interview is here! It is worth your time and to prove it I am offering a money-back guarantee.

What you can expect when he gets the One Ring...in the extended.

Why "Graumagus"?

It's kind of a bastardized german for "gray mage" (which is actually "graues mage" in german). I wanted a moniker nobody else had, instead of something like "Gandalf_4721". Google my handle and everything you find is me except for a few exerpts from a very strange german role-playing game (assuming a troll isn't stealing my identity somewhere since I started the blog).

Why "Frizzen Sparks"?

I really like flintlock muzzle loading firearms (one of these days I might even get around to getting a damn long rifle instead of just my pistols). Without a good shower of sparks from the flint striking the frizzen, the powder in the pan doesn't ignite, and the gun doesn't fire. I could say that it was intended to convey that my blog was meant to start ignition on debating topics or something else symbolic, but I'm really not that deep. It just popped into my head while I was pondering names, and the domain was free.

If for some reason you couldn't use the names "Graumagus" and "Frizzen Sparks" what names would you use instead?

I'd probably go with "Willie MacPhearson" (which is my living history persona) and "The Rabid Platypi" for the blog name, because it makes no sense, it rolls off the tongue, and "Tasty Manatees" was already taken.

What's so anachronistic about your asshole?

It's callused from years of wiping with corn cobs.

What 3 things piss you off the most?

Oooo... to pick only three... this is hard...hmmmm.. I'd say liberals who push revisionist history, hypocrites (and we are all hypocrites to some extent, I save my ire for serial hypocrites like people who claim to be for racial equality but support affirmative action), and the fact that Charmin hasn't come out with a squeezably soft corn cob.

Fluffy bunny rabbits or fuzzy ducklings?

I'd have to say the bunnies. You definitely get more meat off of them than ducklings. Heck, you'd need at least six or seven ducklings to make a decent kebob. If the ducks were full grown I would have went with them.

How many angstroms in a gigameter?

Whoever asked this should realize it's their fault that this interview has taken so long to get finished. Every time I hit about 73 billion my kids would start yelling and make me lose count.

Popular legend has it that Scots wear nothing under their kilts. If this is so, how do they protect their royal jewels from the hazards of battle, freezing weather and marauding trollwives?

During battle it wasn't uncommon for Scots to drop plaid completely and rush into the fray naked. They believed that there's no defense better than a good offense, and there's nary a sight on heaven or earth more offensive that screaming, pasty white, kilt rash mottled, naked scotsmen. If that didn't frighten the enemy into running away, the royal jewels made themselves a pretty small target due to the effects of chilly weather on exposed male plumbing.
No living history event has let us reenact this.

If you were feelin' really really snacky and there was nuthin' in the fridge but mayo, olives, hersheys chocolate syrup, salsa and a few stale twizzlers from last Halloween, what would you do?

Well, I don't really care for olives, so if they are in the fridge they belong to my wife. Seeing as how olives usually have a 15 minute life expectancy when she's around, I'd leave those for her. Stale twizzlers are great for dipping into salsa, used to be a staple geek night (D & D playing night) culinary treat. As for the mayo and chocolate syrup, I'm thinking "Tangy Chocolate Mousse".

You have a choice between saving a princess from a fearsome dragon, or going to a titty bar with the other knights, what say you, Sir Graumagus?

Depends on a few factors. Is it another knight's birthday or bachelor party? If so I'd kind of be obligated to buy the guy a codpiece dance and a few rounds of mead.

Also, has this princess been kidnapped by the dragon, or did the king put his daughter under the protective custody of the dragon? Kings usually do that when their daughters are complete sluts, so I'd probably go for the princess. Ahhhh who am I kidding, I'd hit the bar, have a few dozen meads, tuck some farthings into a few garters, get the guys to help me slay the dragon after last call, then we'd all hit Perkin's for eggs benedict.

If you had the One Ring, what would you do?

(Laughs maniacally). The first thing I'd do is make Alyson Hannigan my personal love strumpet. Yes, I know I'm married, but the Bearer of the One Ring deserves a little on the side. Then I'd make Fox replace all these shitty reality shows with the ones I love that the bastards canceled (Firefly, Dark Angel, Family Guy). Then I would rule with a somewhat benevolent iron fist for eternity. Uhhmm, you weren't actually expecting a "destroy the ring for the good of humanity" answer were you?

What the hell were you doing in Seattle yesterday? I swear I saw you crossing the street in greenwood in your cap and jacket. Or was it your evil doppleganger? although, hmmm... Maybe that should be...Your GOOD doppleganger?

I hate my Evil Twin, he's always starting when I want to begin. Actually it was me, I was really hungry for a salmon omelet (which you can get a lot of places, but you can only get good in Seattle). In Rockford, IL there is a big, ugly, orange scrapmetal sculpture thing by an artist named Alexander Liberman (the Rockford "symbol"). There is an even larger orange scrap pile in Seattle. I've found that by banging my head against the symbol three times and chanting "God Rockford SUCKS!" I can teleport between the two.

Zoos--fun for everyone or depressing?

Fun if you're a kid, but depressing for a wolf. Last time I hit the zoo, the wolves looked decidedly like they wanted to put a makeshift shiv to a guard's throat and bust out.
The Grizzly bears, on the other hand, seems quite happy to be fed and be a lazy ass in his pool. Come to think of it, I'd be pretty happy to be fed and be a lazy ass in a pool too. The Lemurs were pretty much indifferent.

Vodka or tequila?

Jose Cuervo and I are pretty tight. Vladimir Smirnoff is a commie bastard. 'Nuff said.

How many keys are on your keyring? How many of those keys do you actually use?

17 keys at the moment, which is much less than when I was younger. I probably use 4 of them a lot, 8 or nine of the others once in a while, and the rest rarely (but if I put them anywhere else I'd never find the damn things when I need them). I've found it's useful to have distinctful keys. I once lost my keys at Six Flags and had to drive home with the spare in my wallet. Based on my description of my keys, they identified and mailed them to me.

Do you think colonizing Mars is the best use of our resources?

No. I think using our resources to install me as ruler of all mankind and figuring out a way to make me immortal is the best use of our resources. Oh, did you mean the best use for everybody, or the best use for me?

What is the most wonderful thing about Tiggers?

They add another interesting psychological twist to the 100 Acre Wood Institution for Mentally Deranged Stuffed Animals. You have Tigger (ADHD), Eeeore (Depression), Pooh (Mental Retardation, Food Addiction), Piglet (Anxiety), Rabbit (Obsessive/Compulsive gardening), Kanga (Drug Addiction. Trust me, everyone keeps craving her cookies for a reason), Roo (Obsessive Hero Worship), Owl (Delusions of Grandeur, initial stages of Alzheimer's), Mole (Obsessive/Compulsive need to fix things), and Christopher Robin (Visual and Auditory Hallucinations of talking, walking stuffed animals.)

If money was no object, where would you choose to live?

My own personal Orbital Death-Ray Platform.

What kind of car do you drive?

Ford Windstar. My wife won't let me buy a hearse.

Are you the kind of friend you want your friends to be?

I think so. And if my friends don't think so, they can go screw themselves (the bastards!)

I'll Give You a Topic...

S&M.

Is it assault if it's between two consenting adults?

Quote of the Day

"We have not the reverent feeling for the rainbow that a savage has, because we know how it is made. We have lost as much as we gained by prying into that matter." -Mark Twain

"Everybody is ignorant only on different subjects." -Will Rogers

Presidential Fun Fact of the Day

Some tidbits about James Madison's inaugurals:

1. Madison was the first president to have an official escort of militiamen. Afterwards, it became customary for the President to have a procession to the Capitol.

2. Madison asked Jefferson to accompany him to the inauguration, but Jefferson declined. "Today I return to the people, and I wish to join them in doing you honor."

3. Madison held grand inaugural balls for both of his terms. Toward the end of the first, the room was so stuffy that some guests fainted. The windows were painted shut and could not be opened, so some of them were smashed open. The dancing continued. After Madison's terms, the inaugural ball became tradition.

4. Another first during the Madison presidency was the White House reception. After taking the Oath, he greeted well-wishers and provided refreshments.

5. A witness claimed Madison spoke so softly at his second inauguration that "scarcely a word could be distinguished".

I'll Give You a Topic...

Free time.

What do you do with yours?

Presidential Fun Fact of the Day

Some tidbits about Thomas Jefferson's inaugurals:

1. John Marshall swore Jefferson in. He was the first of nine presidents Marshall would swear in while Chief Justice of the Supreme Court.

2. Jefferson walked to Capitol Hill for his first inauguration. After taking the Oath of Office, he returned to his boardinghouse and had lunch with the other boarders like any other day.

3. Due to his unorthodox views on religion, Jefferson was called an atheist by some. Even so, he did incorporate God into his inaugural addresses. In the first he referred to "that infinite Power which rules the destinies of the universe." For the second, he used "that Being in whose hands we are."

4. Like John Adams, widower Jefferson opted not to have an inaugural ball. He too had fireworks and went to bed early.

5. Federalists were so unhappy with Jefferson's election that on the day he took office, Boston's Columbian Centinel newspaper printed an obituary to "The Federal Administration".

February 23

A lot of things happen on this date. Here are a few:

In 1997, Scotland researchers announced the successful cloning of a sheep named Dolly. By March 4, President Bill Clinton imposed a ban on federal funds for human cloning.

In 1991, the ground offensive of Desert Storm began.

In 1942, the Japanese attacked the U.S. mainland. (I originally posted about this here.)

In 1868, W.E.B. DuBois was born.

I Could Be Wrong, But...

...the following is the shortest English sentence to include all letters of the alphabet:

Jackdaws love my big sphinx of quartz.

Almost sounds dirty.

Quote of the Day

"Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety." -Benjamin Franklin

"The true danger is when liberty is nibbled away, for expedients, and by parts." -Edmund Burke

Ask and You shall receive?

I found this the other day while working at one of my clients

WOMEN DON'T ASK

A few years ago, when Linda was serving as the director of the Ph.D. program at her school, a delegation of women graduate students came to her office. Many of the male graduate students were teaching courses of their own, the women explained, while most of the female graduate students had been assigned to work as teaching assistants to regular faculty. Linda agreed that this didn't sound fair, and that afternoon she asked the associate dean who handled teaching assignments about the women's complaint. She received a simple answer: "I try to find teaching opportunities for any student who approaches me with a good idea for a course, the ability to teach, and a reasonable offer about what it will cost," he explained. "More men ask. The women just don't ask."

This is the opening paragraph from the introduction to the book: Women Don't Ask: Negotiation and the Gender Divide the full introduction can be found Here .

The point that author is making is that much of the disparity in salaries between men and women can be traced to the fact that men are more prone to negotiate than women.

The impact of neglecting to negotiate when starting a new job is so substantial and difficult to overcome that some researchers who study the persistence of the wage gap between men and women speculate that much of the disparity can be traced to differences in entering salaries rather than differences in raises.

If nothing else read the intro to the book on the site above.

I think that this raises an excellent point that that can benefit women and men as well. Too often I have seen people settle for what is offered for various reasons. There is nothing to be lost by asking for more. In most case the worst that can happen is that you are told "no". In my experience I have found that the answer is usually "yes" though. My boss is always amazed at the things I have been able to acquire for our "lab" at work simply by asking. It's not always about money; I work in technology so there is what I call the "toy" factor for us. It could be anything that you think will make your working life better.

So think about your own experiences, have you ever thought about asking for more, or do you settle for what is given to you and why? .

I'll Give You a Topic...

Venison sausage and bear meat pizza.

I come from Wisconsin and need to be vigilant that I am not being served Bambi or BooBoo snacks in place of "normal" food.

What kind of foods won't you eat?

February 20

In 1962, John Herschel Glenn, Jr. became the first American to orbit Earth. He made 3 orbits in his Friendship 7 capsule.

In 1986, the MIR ("peace") space station was launched without crew from Kazakhstan.

I'll Give You a Topic...

Shoes.

How many pairs do you own that you never wear and why?

February 19

In 1942, President Franklin Roosevelt signed Executive Order 9066. As a result, some 110,000 Japanese-Americans in coastal Pacific areas were placed in concentration camps. Two-thirds of these people were U.S. citizens. Approximately $400 million in property was lost by them as they were sent to camps in Arizona, Arkansas, inland California, Colorado, Idaho, Utah, and Wyoming. They were released almost three years later on January 2, 1945.

I'll Give You a Topic...

Beer.

How many beers must one ingest before it tastes good?

February 18

In 1930, Clyde Tombaugh discovered Pluto from the Lowell Observatory in Flagstaff, Arizona.

Quote of Day

Yesterday we talked male parts. Now it's time for female parts.

When a man can't explain a woman's actions, the first thing he thinks about is the condition of her uterus.

-Clare Boothe Luce

The only people any good at cunnilingus are didgeridoo players because they can do circular breathing, which means they can go down on you for about six years. And that's how long it takes.

-Jenny Eclair

Presidential Fun Fact of the Day

Fun facts from John Adams's inauguration.

1. There was an abundance of tears at Adams's inauguration. People were distraught that George Washington was leaving the presidency.

2. Adams acquired a new carriage to take him to Philadelphia, where he took the Oath of Office indoors at Congress Hall. Washington, by contrast, had ridden horseback from Mt Vernon to New York City eight years previously.

3. Adams wrote his own address, which was a bit on the wordy side. One sentence was over 700 words long.

4. Adams did not have an Inaugural Ball. Instead, he had fireworks and went to bed early.

5. The president-elect did not sleep the night before he was inaugurated. He wrote to his wife, "I was very unwell, had no sleep the night before...was in great doubt whether to say anything or not besides repeating the oath."

6. Adams also wrote to his wife about Washington's demeanor at the inauguration that, "Methought I heard him think ay! I am fairly out and you fairly in! See which of us will be the happiest."

I'll Give You a Topic...

Male nudity in films.

I've made a point to rent all the Ewan MacGregor naked movies. Multiple times.

Do you really care one way or another about seeing male frontal nudity in a movie?

February 17

The most important thing to happen (to Chicagoans) on this date in history was the birth of Michael Jordan. He is 41.

In 1909, Geronimo died at Fort Sill, OK at the age of about 80.

Quote of the Day

Let's talk penises...

It is not just there to look pretty, a thing it is very bad at anyway.

-Julie Burchill

A delicately rosy, silky-satin, somehow innocent, always-vulnerable erect penis is probably the most fascinating object in the world.

-Helen Gurley Brown

Presidential Fun Fact of the Day

Fun facts from George Washington's Inauguration.

1. The inauguration was originally scheduled for March 4, but not enough members of Congress could reach New York City in time. It was rescheduled for April 30. Unfortunately, it was too late to fix the souvenirs, which were printed with the original date on them.

2. Washington's inaugural address was originally written with the help of his friend and sometime poet David Humphreys. The draft was 73 pages long and included many historical facts regarding the American struggle for independence.

3. Unhappy with the original address, Washington sent a draft to James Monroe to review. Monroe used some aspects of the original speech in a new draft, which he returned to Washington. Washington liked Monroe's version and fine-tuned it before delivering that speech after he took the Oath of Office.

4. Washington's address was a mere 20 minutes long. It included religious references, which set a precedent: every inaugural speech since has referred to God (but not Jesus).

5. When Washington repeated the Oath, he added "So help me God" to the end. That line is not in the official Oath.

6. After Washington was sworn in as President, the officiant shouted, "Long live George Washington, President of the United States!" This was later criticized as too monarchistic, and has never been used again.

I'll Give You a Topic...

Hillary Clinton.

Why do so many conservatives hate her so passionately?

Discuss.

Quote-like thought of the day

Ain klai-zeiyin chazak min ha'adishut; lo t'natzchuha.

-Jewish proverb

Translation: There is no stronger weapon than indifference; you won't beat it.

I'll Give You a Topic...

Jelly Bellies.

I think the best flavor is Juicy Pear. A close second is Plum.

What do you think?

Hiatus Off

Okay, I am officially calling an end to my "hiatus." (Now that the Daytona 500 is over I have time to focus, don't you know.)

Some history: 6 years ago today, Dale Earnhardt won the Daytona 500. The greatest driver ever* finally overcame his 500 Jinx to take home NASCAR's biggest single race prize. And it was good.

Today his son became a 500 winner. And it was good.

Turning to other news...

Next Saturday the Munuvians are moving to a new home. The addresses will remain the same. During the move, I will be unable to post and you will be unable to comment. Since I only have 5 readers left, this should not be a major inconvenience.

Please e-mail questions for "Ask Jen" and also for a Mookie interview.

I think that covers it. Thanks to The Guys for posting occasionally to keep the blog from emptying out. Presidential Fun Facts and other posty goodness will resume tomorrow. Whoo!

* And don't waste my time with any Richard Petty (or other driver) nonsense.

Teapot Dome

Since this is a History and Stuff site I figured I'd do my bit...

The Teapot Dome Scandal
In 1921 the Department of the Interior took over control of two naval oil reserves from the Navy Department. The first was in Teapot Dome, Wyoming and the second Elk Hills, California. Warren G. Harding's Secretary of the Interior, Albert Fall, leased the fields to Harry Sinclair and Edward Doheny respectively. This was done without opening the lease to competitive bidding. In 1922-3 Senate hearings on the leasing it came to light that both Sinclair and Doheny had given Fall large interest free loans. Doheny gave $100,000 in '21 and Sinclair gave after Fall retired in '23. Fall was convicted of accepting bribes and fined $100,000 as well as a year in prison. Both Doheny and Sinclair were acquitted of bribery charges. The two oil fields were restored to government control in 1927 by Supreme Court decision.
Of course those are just the dry facts.
The story was broken by the Wall Street Journal on April 14, 1922. Senator John Kendrick (D, Wyoming) introduced a resolution to look into the matter the next day. When Senator Robert La Follete (R, Wisconsin) arranged for the Committee on Public Lands to look into the situation, he had his office ransacked. The hearings were lead by Senator Thomas Walsh (D, Montana) and his successful investigation pushed him into the national limelight. One of the larger judicial precedents to come out of the case was McGrain v. Daugherty. This establishes Congress' right to force testimony like a regular court by presuming legislative purpose in the request, even if the express purpose to show wrongdoing.

Hope you enjoyed this little foray into American history. Stay tuned for next time when we discuss the Whiskey Ring scandal.

Presidential Facts

Before Jack Daniels there was George Washington? In 1797 George Washington laid the ideal foundation for a grand new venture, one of America's largest distilleries. For an interesting glimpse into the last couple of years of his life check out Washington, Distiller by Delia Rios. It's a good story on how Washington build a distillery at Mount Vernon that would sell over 11,000 gallons of whiskey in 1799.